Free to Be Me

March 21, 2017 — Leave a comment

Good evening my bitches! Well, I’ve successfully completed my first full day at my old job, in my new life, as Denise. And, guess what my bitches? It was rather anti-climactic. And that’s an incredibly good thing to have happened.

I woke up as usual this morning, and went about my daily routine: cold, bubbly caffeine to wake up, potty, shower, then get ready for work. Only this time, instead of jeans, a polo or dress shirt, and sneakers or dress shoes it was a denim skirt, black blouse, nude 20170320_221002pantyhose, and my “Stevie Nicks” boots (pic at right is relaxing after work). Also, instead of just stopping at my daily wear, I added full eyeliner top and bottom, some color highlight on my lash lines, lipstick, and my wig. And instead of transferring drivers license and bank cards between purse and wallet, I just slung my purse over my shoulder and was out the door!

There was not a single ounce of nervousness or anxiety as I pulled into my office. I looked in the rear-view mirror, dabbed a fresh coat of lipstick, and strolled right into the office. I was immediately greeted by variations of “Hi D!”, “Morning Denise, have a good weekend?”, etc.

I did have a few nice compliments, but overall, as I said anti-climactic. It was just another day at work. The only difference was my physical appearance. And that, my bitches, had no impact on the work that I, my team, or my company performs on a daily basis.

And that’s how it should be everywhere. Who cares if someone is gay, lesbian, bi, trans, black, white, Jew, Muslim, Christian, etc? At the end of the day, are we competent at what we do, do our co-workers respect us, are we productive? Are we being hurtful or injurious to anyone? And ultimately, are we happy? For me, the answer is yes! I am happy! I am free to be myself! I am Denise!

 

 

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This is it my bitches! Tomorrow morning, my morning that is, I will get up, put on my denim skirt, “Stevie Nicks boots”, a cute black blouse, make-up, and wig, then go to work as Denise! I am soooo excited I can barely sleep!

This has been a long time coming with slow changes to appearance, and prep work that it’s hard to believe it is finally coming to fruition!

I will definitely write of my ecperience tomorrow. Until then,

Ciao,
denise

Final week

March 14, 2017 — Leave a comment

Good evening my bitches! Yes, I know it’s been a while since I’ve written but this gurl has been busy. I’m in my final week before I transition to Denise full-time! I’m so excited!

I’ve a few more outfits since I last posted. And I’ve dropped another 10 pounds! And as my girlfriend would say, it allowed me to go “shopping in my closet”. That helped my add another skirt, 2 blouses, and a dress. This gurl is ready!

This time next week I will have spent a full day at work as Denise. Look out world, here I come!

7 days and counting!

Ciao,
denise

“D-Day” Part 1

February 23, 2017 — Leave a comment

Hello again my bitches! Well, it’s been a day. A “D-Day” to be exact. And the first of many I hope.

To begin with, I had my first session with the gender identity therapist. And I got up, put on my skinny jeans, one of my new blouses, and my pink pumps and off I went. It was a good session but a lot of it was background, and though process leading up to where I am today. She was a good listener and provided a lot of support. In the end, she decided, based on my where I am and how I got there, is that she would be more of a sounding board and progress meter as you will.

After the session I stopped off at a boutique that specializes in apparel for the trans and cross-dressing community as I was looking for breast forms. This girl needs a bit of help upstairs f you know what I mean my bitches 🙂

The sales person was very helpful and with her assistance I selected a size 11 silicon form. That translates to about a size 46-B. It seemed to fit my body shape and size and it looked so natural. The only problem was that they could only find the left one. They had the box for the right side but it was empty. So I left them my contact info and they were going to continue looking or re-order another pair and call me back when they come in. So, I left empty-handed as it were.

Then, my bitches, it was off for more clothes shopping! I am really looking for a denim skirt to go with my boots or a few of my tops. A girl can’t have clothes, am I right?? I stopped at 4 different stores to no avail. I guess it’s still a bit early for that attire.

But amidst all that I realized I had the day off to myself, I’m dressed as Denise, and just having fun. It was “Denise’s Day Out”!

And that brings me to the definition of what I now see as the true “D-Day”: the day I fully transition into Denis full-time. So while this was “part-1”, the next “D-Day” will be the day I say good-bye to my old life and welcome my new self. I may even consider celebrating it as a second birthday.

That’s it for tonight my bitches,

Ciao,
denise

An “Outing” Outing

February 21, 2017 — Leave a comment

Good evening my bitches! I hope everyone is still doing well! I know I am 🙂

Well, another interesting and fun outing tonight! I and my co-worker S had plans to go see a movie tonight. And, as is becoming the norm, dressed as Denise.

We finalized our plans at work and I left to go home around 5:00 PM and we were to meet at the theater, have a quick bite and a drink at 6:30, then on to the show at 7:30. And, as is typical with well laid plans, they took a slight detour.

It wasn’t long after I arrived home and started changing that I received a text from the on-call rotation that one of my critical jobs had failed. And, as the on-call DBA wasn’t home their estimate was that they couldn’t investigate until after 7:00 PM which puts some mission critical reporting data at risk.

I only live 10 minutes from the office so it made more sense for me to go investigate the failure, and fix if necessary, rather than wait until after 7:00. But therein lies my quandary: I’m half-dressed. I had taken off my jeans and polo and had already donned my stockings, camisole, skinny jeans, and pink pumps. And, I was half-way through touching up my make-up (adding a little evening glam as it were). So… I could either finish dressing and make-up and go into the office as Denise, or I could take everything off, put my “man-clothes” back on, and go in. But if I did the latter I wouldn’t get to spend the evening as Denise. And, I figured it would take more time to remove my evening make-up and change clothes back that it might put the evening in jeopardy.

So I decided that since quite a few people at work already know of my transition (and most likely a few more will find out Wednesday at Happy Hour, and that I will be coming out fully anyway in a few weeks, that what the fuck, I’m going to finish getting dressed.

After I had made that decision I was out the door and headed back to the office as Denise. I actually felt a little bit of excitement and, honestly, I didn’t give  fuck!

I pulled into a spot right in front of the door, grabbed my employee badge, and my purse, and strode right into the office and to my cubicle. I saw a few people still there and only one said hi to me and, as she already knew, greeted me by my female name, and I got down to business.

Fortunately for me it was an easy fix and I was out of the office and at the mall where we planned to meet right on time.

And S and I had a fun night (although the movie didn’t quite live up to expectations). I also got to tell her about Denise’s “big adventure” in the office to which she gawked and was amazed that I had the nerve to even think about it.

But as I said my bitches, I am passed giving out fucks. This is my life, and I’m living it for me!

And on that note my lovelies, I am out of here!

Ciao,
denise

Hello there my bitches and happy post Valentine’s Day! I hope everyone received the day they hoped for!

As for me, I got a cute surprise at work. I had been at one meeting early and then stopped by my boss’s office to give him a few updates and status on some items my team is working on. When I got back to my desk, I found the a flower and card next to my keyboard (see featured image).

And no my bitches, I do not have a secret admirer (nor do I want one). It turned out the card and flower was from one of our tier 1 support personnel. Inside the envelope was a card shaped like a piece of toast and on it she wrote that I was “her jam” and that she couldn’t wait to meet Denise in person. I can’t begin to tell you how that made me feel. For one, that I have such a supportive company, is immensely huge. And second, that I have co-workers who care enough that they are eager to meet my new self.

I walked over to tell her thank you, and that it DID mean a lot to me. She just gave me a big hug and said “I take care of my girls”.

And on that note my bitches, I am out of here tonight.

Ciao my lovely bitches!
denise

A Big Step Forward

February 14, 2017 — Leave a comment

Hello my bitches! Today was a huge step forward for me! I had a follow-up meeting with the VP of HR for my company. In short, I have the green light and thumbs up to move forward with my plan to transition. Not that I had any doubts.

And, the meeting just confirmed what an amazing company I work for. To begin with I was told I have the full support of my company. Then followed a few questions from “legal”

  1. Will I prefer that my co-workers use male, female, or gender neutral pronouns?
  2. Will I transition gradually (some days male, some female) or transition all at once and just start working from that day out as Denise?
  3.  Will I change my name, or go by a different name?
  4. Will I want a new photo badge, and nameplate for my cube?
  5. And, the all important: Which restroom did I plan on using?

To me, questions two and five are related and I had thought about them for a while. For example, when I am out and about as Denise, I do use the lady’s room now. But, most of the places I go are single stall restrooms so it’s not a big issue. But at work it could be a different matter if one day I’m dressed in male attire, and the next female. I don’t think it fair to my co-workers to see me in the men’s room one day, and the ladies next. But, if I’ve fully transitioned, and coming to work as Denise every day, then that is a different matter.At that point I would have no qualms using the ladies room every day. Therefore, my answer was that my plan would be to complete a full switch: One day I’d come to work as my male presentation, talk to my team members, then the next work day (probably after a weekend) show up to work as Denise. And from that point on, use the ladies room.

And the first question (and the third) are related. I do prefer that my co-workers use female pronouns with me (she, her, etc). As for a name change, I still haven’t decided. Several co-workers already use my gender neutral moniker: D. That works, but in some sense it goes against my wish for co-workers to use female pronouns. At the same time, “D” is a cute nickname I can still use while officially going by Denise. Thoughts my bitches?

So now everything is in place at work and the pieces are moving. Next week I have my first session with a specialist in gender identity issues and I plan to see her fully dressed as Denise. Then, it’s more a matter of enough wardrobe and timing along with a plan (hopefully) blessed and approved by said therapist. If all goes well, I hope to walk into work on the first day of Spring (20 March) as Denise and never look back.

Ciao my bitches,
denise

I Bought ’em!

February 13, 2017 — Leave a comment

Good evening bitches! Yes, I bought those boots! And ooh, they feel so wonderful!

I also got some new jeans (in the same pic) along with 2 new tops (pics to come soon). So there I am with my gorgeous new shoes and leg that won’t quit 😉

Other than that, it was another wonderful weekend where I’ve spent most of it as Denise. From the moment I woke up Saturday, through all day Sunday.

Started off with a drop-in at my salon to get my nails fixed. Then off to get the shoes. On the way we stopped at a bib-box store and did some shopping. That’s where I got the new jeans and the two tops. Oh, and walking into the women’s dressing room now is automatic. I take my clothes and I sashay right in there. I belong there. It is mine too!

Then a final stop at the shoe store. I had called ahead to make sure he had them in stock so when we got there it was just a matter of a final fitting. And as I walked in I told the owner that “I’m going to be wearing these out of here, just so you know”. I paid, and we walked out as I strutted my sexy ass up and down the sidewalk in the downtown area. We stopped at an old-fashioned burger joint and share some malts before heading back home.

Our original plan had been to see a movie but as it was sold out we just opted for dinner and to go home and chill and try again for the movie on Sunday.

So this morning, we were up, showered, and dressed for a date with me in my new jeans and boots. We’re even to the point now where we hold hands, kiss and flirt in public like we did before I started my transition.

After the movie my girlfriend went home and I ran my errands: Grocery shopping and then hanging out at my local watering hole.

So that’s two weekends in a row where I’ve been able to be myself. It’s close my bitches, that day where that’s me full-time. I can see the light.

For now, bed time and beauty rest my bitches!

Ciao,
denise

Solo Night

February 10, 2017 — Leave a comment

Hello again my bitches! Well, it was a solo night out for me tonight. Yeah, I know… Brave!

But I got home and didn’t want to sit around all night so I changed clothes and went to one of my favourite hang-outs for a sangria or two. And I did it all by myself: 20170209_211051no friends, no co-workers. Just me and my pink and black lace top and jeans.

And guess what my bitches? I had a great time!

I hadn’t been there in a while nor seen one of my favourite bartenders in forever. Therefore, when I walked in, she didn’t initially recognize me. But by the time I sat down she did and responded with a “Wow! I almost didn’t recognize you! You look amazing!”

Aside from that, the restaurant was rather full and there were only two seats at the bar and I had to check that a seat was actually available. (Yes, I had to speak to strangers!)

And, they were rather nice. They spoke to me a bit off and on and were friendly enough. But most of the time I spent talking with the bartender and my other friends who work there.

At one point, this girl had to use the powder room. But as this is becoming second nature, so I ordered one more sangria, grabbed my purse, and headed to the lady’s room to take care of business. And guess what my bitches? There was a line!

And this girl handled it no problem. As I walked up the last woman standing there informed me of the obvious “There’s a wait”.

I told her I could tell and just took my place along the wall with her. We spoke a few words, idle chat, about how busy the place was, then it was her turn. She waved, walked into the room, and it was my turn to stand there. And finally it was my turn. I did “my thing” and returned across the restaurant to my place at the bar. Looking back, it didn’t really dawn on me how many people I had to pass to get from my seat, to the lady’s room, and then back to my seat. And what hit me was, that I didn’t really notice or care how many there were or if they were staring, gawking etc. I was just doing my thing and being me and enjoying myself.

And on that note, my bitches, I am done. This girl is tired and needs to go to bed.

So until next time,

Ciao!
denise

Girl’s Night In

February 8, 2017 — Leave a comment

Sigh my bitches, this girl is tired tonight. And, as promised, no rambling, long-winded, post tonight. Just me in sweats and a cute t-shirt.

Unfortunately I’ve spent most of my night working from home which just added to my exhausting day. So no girl talk, no make-up or latest clothing talk. I’m just one tired girl.

That said, there are a few things that I feel like I should write about but I just don’t have the energy. But, look for these topics coming soon.

  • Texas’ first trans mayor
  • More on bathroom bills and equal treatment
  • The Boy Scouts recent decision to allow trans boys

In the meantime, I just wanted to give my bitches a shout-out and say that I appreciate all my followers very much.

Ciao my lovelies,
denise